It has been 12 days without social media, and after experiencing a wonderful disconnect, I found myself doomscrolling legitimate news channels. No matter what I do, the media on my screens steals my time.

Like a thief in the night, I did not realize everything was gone until I opened my jewelry box and all the treasures were missing. Clarity was replaced with brain fog. My calm was switched out for chaos.

What I gained after the past few days of doom distractions was information that would not matter in 5 years, like why Ben Affleck was kicked off Instagram two times. Why did I need to scroll through that “news” story instead of doing some yoga, reading my book or cleaning my house? I also learned a lot about politics, business and lost some of myself in the process.

Yesterday, I disconnected with a long hike, good people and beautiful views. I did take some photos but it was not for Meta. It was just a great day and I want to remember it.  I was watching rocks instead of finding out what Ben Affleck was doing with Instagram.

Just like that, my heirlooms were back. I feel more at peace and can see again, literally and figuratively. I liken the experience to wearing my prescribed corrective lenses. Since high school, I cannot legally drive without them, and when I peered through the oculars on the vision machine at 18, I remember asking the proctor at the DMV which language was the exam in. I could not imagine that it was a proper English alphabet that I was seeing, but with my glasses I recognized every letter. That is what it feels like to feel better. I can see again.

This process for change is never a straight line and I will continue to be patient with myself. 

What I know right now:

I am calmer today.

Yesterday was amazing.

I am grateful my body allowed me to reconnect with nature.

I have some things to work on. 

I am not failing; I am learning.